How to Stop People from Bugging You About Getting Married
“Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, ‘You’re next’. They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.”
I chuckled a lot when I read the forwarded email sent by a friend that includes the above punch lines about getting married. Many people – most of them close to our hearts – are insensitive to the pain they are causing to their “single” loved ones by bugging them about getting married. Honestly, it really hurts and irritates someone who probably has been uncomfortably staying single for quite a long period of time then his or her friends and family members would keep on asking when he or she is going to find that “special someone.” It causes pressures and makes the person worry.
A woman may worry if the man she’s been waiting for will really come – on time – or not! A man may worry whom to choose to marry from his long list of choices??? Or better yet, what if he just marries 2, 3 or half of them? Just kidding. A woman may worry if these men who are courting her are genuinely showing who they really are, or cleverly wearing masks to deceive her. Are they the same persons after the wedding as they are while courting her? A man may worry if he will be accepted by the woman he loves. What if someone will come much more handsome, richer, far better than him? These and many other thoughts cause our single ladies and gentlemen to worry a lot. There are those who worry if they will still be able to get married.
Marriage is not an easy thing to be taken lightly. It should be regarded highly, honored, and respected by both partners (husband & wife). It should be treasured, valued and taken care of. It should be cultivated and nurtured in alignment with God’s principles from His word – the Bible.
Furthermore, the scripture is also honoring people who are called by God to be single for life. It is called the blessed-singleness or happy-singleness. Are you still single yet happy? Don’t worry whom to marry. God caused Adam – the first bachelor – to just fall into a deep sleep. And when he woke up, behold, God gave her Eve – a suitable partner for him. Are you single yet satisfied? Don’t worry when and whom to marry. Enjoy your being single. You don’t know the many advantages of being single that you’ll lose the moment you enter marriage. Concentrate on your career; focus on what the Lord wants you to do at the present. Learn to wait… and wait, for the Bible says, “God will make all things beautiful in its time.”
Let’s take a look further in Genesis 2:18-25 when God saw that among all His creation there was no suitable partner for Adam – the first man He created. He let Adam fall into a deep sleep while He fashioned by His own hands the fitting partner He designed for him. When Adam awoke God brought Eve to him. Adam – the first bachelor didn’t spend his time worrying whom to marry. In fact I assumed that it never occurred on his mind (there was no other human being around during those time; different kinds of animals of course; and he never had any idea what a woman looks like much less about getting married!)
Anyway, it was the Lord who noticed and saw the need for Adam to have a suitable partner. God said in verse 18 that, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” In this account we can glean a few lessons. First, God knows our needs, including the need for a suitable partner in life. Second, God has a way to meet our needs. In fact He can make a way to prepare someone for you without you knowing it. Third, God is the one fashioning someone for you and will give her/him to you at the proper time. Fourth, don’t worry whom to marry and don’t stay up late wide awake thinking about this. Just learn to trust God that He has kept in store the best for you and allow Him to give you a deep sleep. When you do, I believe you will be happy and for sure will be healthy!